I'm pretty sure this is the most confused I've ever been. I'm even confused about being confused. Its confusing... ha.
School is... well going. I can't wait until December 13th at 11:00am. So it will be over. All I have to think about after that is what I'm going to do for the rest of my degree (minor........) . Education, Performance, Music Therapy.... like really. I have no clue. I feel like I'm supposed to do ed. But just because everyone else does. And thats the only thing that can guarentee you a steady job (once you find one). People tell me "do what you want to do..." and thats all fine and dandy, but other people are saying "you have to do education, you'll never get a job". I don't know what to do... oh I guess you could say CONFUSED. (Good word.)
Seems like I get confused about everything. And alot of the times, it goes the bad way. I hope that doesn't happen with school.
Also, who are my friends? You know when you feel like you have an abundance... and really, I can't even tell who they are anymore. Some of them seem to come to me when they need something... which is what friends are for, but its more than that too. I feel like I don't have anyone in certain places to talk to. I need to be super close to a person before I really talk ot them... there's only 2 people in my whole life who I've told everything to. If I have a problem, they know I do before I even do. Its cool.
Don't even get me started on theother confusing thing. Yikes. Its a little problematic.
I'm a runner? did you know that. No, not like olympics or anything (if you know me, you might be laughing). But I run away from anything, and everything. If I don't want to face it I won't. I find an excuse. Simple example, but praticing... me: "Oh I have to read my bible". Which is not a bad thing... but still, see where I'mcomming from? I always run away.
If I get really close to someone, and then realize I'm going to hurt them, or myself, I run away. That needs to be fixed...
Well I needed to vent. And I have a lesson in 7minutes. (i'm going to regret reading the bible after this lesson :))
later gators!
1 comment:
I know how you feel about the job stuff. I think a lot of people feel that way, but it's easy to feel alone when the people who know what they're doing are so vocal and confident about it.
And I'm your friend, fo-ev-er (the Sandlot!). You'll always have a special place in my heart, Melissa. Two of the best & most important summers of my life were 80% due to you. You taught me so much about patience and working with a partner, as well as kindness and love in so many forms. I looooooove you!
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